Part of me wants to scream fuck Christmas. The other part of me wants Christmas to mean something more than presents and stuff. Christmas is so triggering in an already toxic society that says it’s our duty to keep abusive family members in our lives rather than seek peace and health, and it is because, by that understanding, we find ourselves at battle with ourselves over our sovereignty.
Read MoreMaking a commitment to yourself means doing what you said you are going to do every day that you say you will do something. That even means on nights that you have to sneak it in right before bed
Read MoreNo one ever told us that it was ok for us to be our own person. No one ever said that we could have self-love, self-esteem, or self-believe. No one told us that we didn’t deserve to be hurt, abused, and mistreated. No one said to us that we could be somebody. And yet they wonder how we got so fucked up?
Read MoreSo how do we be more grateful as trauma survivors? I think it starts with measuring the place you in life. Can it be better? Sure. But, think about this, if you are reading this right now, then that means you are alive, which means that you have every opportunity to create the life you want.
Read MoreWe are faced with accepting the hard truth that trauma has been happening for generations. It is in our DNA, and in part, I believe that we seek violence as a way to share our emotions and in part because we don’t know how to share our emotions.
Read MoreI hope that we can come to this place as a community of people healing trauma and accept that we have to be aggressive, not in a violent way, but in a way that catapults us into the life we want to have. I often come back to this notion: Click to read more
Read MoreHow does one differentiate the need for formal education in trauma healing as mandatory versus optional? I have been thinking about how Americans and most first world countries have been so inundated with the idea that someone must have gone to university to be taken seriously in mental health, and I can’t help but wonder the authenticity of it all
Read MoreThis trauma healing list will be short and sweet, with plenty of room for elaboration in the near future. For now, these are the top 5 things that you can do now to start healing trauma.
Read MoreI wish I could take my feelings of wanting everyone to be safe within their emotions and sprinkle it on the world. I guess in some ways I do as I write this, but that thing inside of us that is scared to be seen just needs to be nurtured and given a little space to be safe. I challenge you to find that for yourself and experience the fullness of the light, the dark, and the gray.
Read MoreLife is not easy for most people. And the comparisons that we tend to make to justify the things that happen to us is entirely unfair.
Read MoreThere is power in standing up for yourself and sticking to your personal boundaries regarding how you participate in life as a trauma survivor. I hate the constant barrage of showing up because of obligation. You don’t owe anyone your time or sanity.
Read MoreWe are taught to mourn the death of our family, our parents, especially. But, how can you mourn someone who hurts you? For a long time, I sat with the idea that from a societal perspective, we are supposed to feel pain when we lose a parent. I think about the burden of shame from others in our lives when we don’t show up kicking and screaming for one more moment together. CPTSD Coach
Read MoreThink about the power that words hold over us. So often, we find ourselves being guided by what other people have defined as the way we should think or feel about ourselves. How many times has someone pointed out that you don’t meet their specifications
Read MoreAs survivors of abuse as children, we find ourselves putting ourselves second. For many of us, we lack any kind of self-esteem. For others, our narrative is so skewed that we believe that we don’t deserve what we see others have. My experience was a mix of both.
Read MoreSome days life is hard! Some days your husband leaves you, your cat dies, you burn the frozen pizza, your mom calls you, your bike gets stolen, and you drink too much coffee, so during that work meeting, you have to excuse yourself for fifteen minutes
Read MoreBut what do you do other than keep going
I wonder
Oh yes I remember that time I thought to myself I’m a survivor
Read MoreAs I sat on the ferry looking out onto the world around me, I finally got it. Letting go is about acknowledging that something terrible has happened to you, accepting that you can’t change the past, choosing to release the grip that you have around it, and making a decision to move forward on your terms.
Read MoreLet’s admit it. We have all had the thought that self-help is stupid. Often we find that understanding to be complimentary to “Why do I have to do all this damn healing?” At least that was my experience. I have felt both incredibly overwhelmed and underwhelmed by this entire self-help thing
Read MoreWhat does healing the body after trauma mean? In those moments of pain that we experience we nervous system goes haywire; we find ourselves in fight or flight. Our sympathetic nervous system is in control, essentially shutting off all functions that are not mandatory for survival.
Read MoreAs abuse survivors, we have to allow ourselves space to exist. In the calm of the moment, we discover truths about ourselves if we are willing to listen.
Your truth, like mine, may be that what you are seeking is happening right now.
Read More
